ahhh.. i would love to enjoy my weekends right now.. but even that seems to be beyond my reach right now.. how ironic.. im having my exams now.. in fact i just finished my history test.. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.. that was the first paper and then comes next week.. paper after paper after paper.....
sucks man... well at first i thought i'd do relatively okay for this.. cause i studied.. but i would not say i studied as hard as the mongolians... they study day and night.. exam or without exam.. arhhh so frustrating.. i did researches and bla bla... thought that my essay would probably be too long.. BUT.. my dear indonesian friend who sat beside me during my test had me thinking other wise.. i was like WHAT THE FUCK?!?!?!? how can anyone write so much? well probably i wrote only like a summary of what Toyotomi Hideyoshi did.. his accomplishments.. while others practically copied the whole textbook down to page.. well.. i must proudly say.. i didnt.. hahah i did it ALL BY MYSELF... ahh that nostalgic intrsuction on english exams papers "Describe with your own words...."
so yeah studied my ass off for toyotomi hideyoshi.. did you know he had an extra thumb on his right hand? hahaha anyways.. in the middle of studying history last night and writing down the essay just now.. i got the whole i can't believe im writing in japanese feel again.. arghh when will this feeling ever go? its so dumb... yet... i cant help feel proud of myself.. five months in japan.. and here we are writing essays.. reading textbooks in japanese.. hahahha damn... but still would prefer writing in english.. some things just cannot be translated from english to japanese.. this is bad actually the way i write essays is that i usually think of what i want to say in english first and then translate... (teachers advise was to directly think in japanese) IM SCREWED... yeah things like "saw the introduction of".. "saw to the pacifism of japan in the..." "it is without doubt.." arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh..... english essays are more fun!!!! my friend who checks my essays went like can you not use such bombastic phrases... i cant help it!!!!
yucks................ next mon i have grammar test... BIG BIG TEST CANT AFFORD TO SCREW THIS UP.. and then tuesday essay and then japanese culture.. and then wednesday politics and economics... and then friday comprehension....
next next week, i have oral and kanji test... DIE DIE DIE.. havent studied anything of those yet... why is this exam so big? cause the universities that one applies for will judge on the results of this exam......... i so want to go to tokyo daigaku...... so i ask myself again... what the hell am i doing here? havent studied some more... properly at least...
my brain hurts....
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